My mom, a charge out of prefer many other people’s moms, is the World’s Greatest Mom. But that didn’t dreary she never did anything that weirded me out while I was growing up. There were heaps of WTF moments in our household, in which I’d witness some bizarre act that I with catlike tread swore I’d never do. Of course, now that I’m one of the many World’s Greatest Moms myself, I’ve establish that on too-frequent an occasion, I’ll do something instinctually and then all of a sudden jiggle upright with ined realization: “Oh, no. I’ve become my mother.” Not that that’s a bad possession – It’s just I never imagined a person could so matter-of-factly pick a booger out of someone else’s nose . . . or that I’d adorn come of that person. Here are seven (and counting) of the eye-rolling things my mom often did that I find myself doing all the time:
1. Wiping snot with her empty hands.
“What is the urgency?!” my elementary-aged self probably wondered when my mom only just wiped my runny nose with nary a tissue. Now, I do it all the time. And if you characterize as I then immediately sanitize my hand, you probably don’t ever want to draw my jeans.
2. Using saliva as a cleaning method.
It’s a cliché mom maneuver, but I can now certify to its greatness. I’ll be sitting mere steps away from a baby wipe, and it calm just makes more sense to lick my finger and rub the banana slime off my kid’s cheek.
3. Draw a blanking her age.
There were at least a half-dozen times growing up in which I witnessed my mom dithering to say how old she was, and not because she didn’t want to reveal her age. She could spout out my complete medical depiction but she couldn’t remember the amount of years she’d been on this earth, which hand me dumbfounded and concerned about her mental ca city. Until earlier this week, when I had to use an online computer to determine if I was 32, 33, or 34.
4. Wanting to be sick instead of her kids.
Whenever I’d be in bed with the flu or a fever, my look after would always say the same thing: “I wish I could take away your torture and be sick instead.” Yeah, right, I’d think. You don’t literally mean that. And yet there I was, with my youngster who was suffering from a stomach bug, and I truly, honestly would have acknowledged anything to be the one projectile vomiting . . . and not just because I think I’ve got think twice aim. (Side note: catching vomit with my bare hands and admitting myself to be vomited on without complaint are two other insane acts I’ve inherited from moms worldwide.)
5. Hating today’s music.
Admirably into my late twenties, my mom would lament the downfall of music whenever I picked the boom box station. Now I’m the one asking anyone who’ll listen what a “nae nae” is and why Drake’s “Hotline Bling” is sedate something that is allowed.
6. Eating previously chewed-on food.
It against to always remind me of the mama bird method of feeding, but now? If I share a crumb of my delicious meal with my child, and she takes a bite and decides to likeness it out, there’s a 97 percent chance I’ll pick up where she left off and use up the job.
7. Saying, “you’ll see when you’re a mom!”
Whenever my mom said this, it was alongside an unsettling despise. Clearly, she meant it as a threat. Why would my mom be so vengeful toward her own daughter? These eras, I finally get it. Based on the amount of times I’ve given her grief for doing the essentially six things alone (never mind all the other moments I wasn’t appreciative of her, at best to gripe about the thankless job that is renting), I can see why she’d want a little yback. Although I’m not noticeably proud of this realization, I take comfort in the fact that someday, I’ll be skilful to ss the torch to my own kid. The snotty, germy, poopy torch.