Trace the arrival of their son Milo in January 2016, the comedian said he now twigs himself so far down in the pecking order that even their dog catches better treatment.
He confessed: «You get married: you’re number one. You had a child: you’re number two. You be enduring a dog: you’re number three.
«So, basically, you just spend your life exactly going down the pecking order and doing what you’re told.»
The Irish TV presenter and his bride live with their one-year-old tot in Los Angeles, though the difficulty of touring with a little one means that the couple haven’t been qualified to return home to their beloved UK as often as they would similar to.
Patrick explained: «It’s a bit more difficult whenever you’ve got Milo, when you’ve got the coddle. We used to come back and forth quite a lot.
«Now he basically runs the dynasty. We call him the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Whatever he wants, he gets.»
His funny disclosure comes after Patrick — who met Cat when they were hosting British chorusing competition Fame Academy — admitted that he broke the golden ascendancy of television before they got together.
«I broke the rule of don’t get your wealth where you get your honey,» he told Lorraine Kelly on her eponymous bull session show today.
«But we went there and what’s good about it is whenever you’re with one someone who’s a spouse to start with, you don’t have to go through all that awkward dating. You moral crack on!»
Patrick married the So You Think You Can Dance presenter in an intimate function in Rome in September 2012 after 11 months of dating.